How UMass Football is Exactly the Same as My Fantasy Team


UMass fell to 2-9 on the season with a brutal loss in Provo to BYU. The Minutemen had two early leads in the first half (6-0 and 9-7), then the Cougars pounced on the unsuspecting young UMass team took advantage of them. Now for a new feature, tentatively called:

How UMass Football is Exactly the Same as My Fantasy Team

  • Actually UMass, with a 2-9 record, is slightly better than my NFL fantasy team, which is 1-10 and on pace for a spectacular first-to-worst finish in the league. Luckily for UMass, the Minutemen don’t have that far to fall.
  • One good quarterback (Drew Brees = Andrew Ford) and one incredibly frustrating quarterback (Philip Rivers = Ross Comis), neither of which can carry a team without support.
  • A whole set of running backs with incredible potential (Todd Gurley, Derrick Henry, Tevin Coleman = Marquis Young, Sekai Lindsay, John Robinson-Woodgett) who haven’t lived up to it as a result of play calling which doesn’t favor the ground game.
  • Wide receivers exhibiting flashes of brilliance and skill (Brandon Cooks, Davante Adams, Michael Crabtree = Dan Jonah, Andy Isabella, Jalen Williams) who haven’t yet found a way to put the whole package together at the same time as the rest of the team.
  • The surprising bright spot at the tight end position (Travis Kelce = Adam Breneman).
  • A wildly inconsistent defense (Carolina Panthers) with a habit of playing to the level of its opponent.


I know what you’re all thinking: Does one successful field goal make up for one missed extra point? The answer is no. Not unequivocally no, just regular no. The field goal was over twice the distance of the extra point, for what it’s worth.



The Minutemen’s final game of the season comes against the Rainbow Warriors on the wonderful island of Oahu. Unfortunately for Honolulu, Aloha Stadium isn’t hosting the NFL Pro Bowl this year (usurped by Orlando), but this UMass vs. Hawaii matchup is nearly as good.

Slim Phil’s Fun Fact of the Week:

This is called a gore sign:


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