UMBR Solves the Coaching Search


With the sudden departure of Pat Kelsey he who shall not be named, the Minutemen are in the market for a new coach. Bamford needs all the help he can get so we at the UMBR thought we would suggest a few candidates.

Al Skinner

As @JakeLevin477 pointed out, Al Skinner would sneaky be an amazing choice to coach the Minutemen. Not only is he a former national coach of the year, Atlantic 10 coach of the year, and ACC coach of the year, but his banner is hanging on the wall of the Bill (source). Al has some serious beef with both Rhode Island and Boston College so it would be pretty fun to watch him turn UMass into the best basketball team in New England.

Lou Roe

Coach Roe is another guy whose banner is on the wall and would be a easy choice to fill the coaching vacancy. He’s been an assistant coach for a while and clearly knows how to bring intensity. He also has just as many sex scandals as championship winning coach, Rick Pitino!

Sam the Minuteman

This one is a little outside of the box, but here’s the idea: Sam the Minuteman coaches the team. Each week a different commenter from will get the privilege of wearing the suit and leading the team. Every week we’ll get to see an entirely different team. The opposition won’t know what to expect! It’s the exact opposite of predictable Coach Kellogg.

Marc Bertrand

Bertrand is a talking head for The Sports Hub, UMass alum and lovable fat guy. He might not know anything about how to win a basketball game, but he had a lot to say about Pat Kelsey leaving.

Slim Phil, Lead Basketball Writer, UMBR

Phil might not be the most experienced candidate on the list, but he certainly knows his stuff. He single-handedly caused Cady Lalanne’s draft stock to plummet with his groundbreaking “Paint in the Paint Theory” of 2014. It’s that type of analytical thinking that UMass was lacking under Coach Kellogg. With Phil at the helm look forward to a Coach Carter-esque play book and the most efficient bus travel in the NCAA.

That’s a free sample of the good stuff that the UMBR is capable of delivering. Bamford, if you’re looking for some extra hands on the search committee shoot us an email at


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